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How would you rate the Gamelive Summer of Love?

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How do you rate the Gamelive Summer of Love?

  • Awesome totally awesome!

    Votes: 12 66.7%

  • Sucked

    Votes: 6 33.3%
  • Total voters
    18
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Matt Rain
Scholar! I got Wally to lose it! I think you would've been proud.
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I was watching, it was a solid effort. Although it did expose how thinly veiled the animosity is around these parts.

Robyn, I don't think I'm missing anything by not going nuts over anything. Part of it stems from the fact that I've got a very comfortable life carved out here, far away from anyone else. I honestly can't remember the last time I had a shitty day, or just a day where someone ruined my mojo with anything more substantial than taking a good parking spot in the rain. In the absence of those negative experiences, I suppose even the things I enjoy most in my life assume a more muted quality. I remember when life used to be very vibrant, full of exhilarating heights and quasi-suicidal lows, and I honestly think my current approach is superior.
 
Bread
How did that transition go from Christianity (Catholicism? ) to agnostic? You made that decision pretty quickly and you haven't seemed to skip a beat. Does it invade your mind often? Or no.
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It was something that was building for a few years, honestly. As I ceased being connected to the rest of humanity in any meaningful sense, I had an ever-decreasing utility for thoughts or behavior patterns which only served to act as social lubricant. Religion was one such crutch.

At the root of it all was the fact that I don't think I'm naturally a very nice person, and I was tired of the external guilt that religion heaped on me for it. By ditching the religion I also ditched the guilt, and now I can be a true prick to people and come home to laugh about it with the cats, never again to entertain the thought that today may have been the day I punched my ticket to hell. Let me tell you, this is real freedom.
 
RS I can dig what you're servin' up for sure. But this is a HUGE decision for someone who had faith for so long. So much bigger than just day-to-day satisfaction.

How were you able to put the whole "eternal damnation" part in the back of your mind? Does that not bother you? Isn't that why everyone "finds God" to begin with?



Oh shit..here we go...another religion thread :lmao:
 
Good call Bread. Scholar wasn't a mere believer, but a guy who did the sign of the cross when you drove past a church. I mean dude. Pretty drastic change, but one that totally makes sense.

God bless Scholar. Or NOT!
 
Well, you know it's not like I stopped believing that it's possible that Heaven and Hell do exist. I can't rule out the possibility, so it's not like I gave God the finger and just went my own way. It's more like I told him that while I think He is very cool, I'm at a point in my life where I need to see other people. I didn't stop loving God, I just started loving myself more than Him, to the point where I was no longer enjoying waking up early every Sunday to engage in His worship. That first martini of the day tastes so much better at 0900h than 1030h, it's a wonder I was ever sober sitting at the organ up in the choir loft.

As far as eternal damnation, the thing that sparked me to abandon my faith was in fact the honest evaluation that if Hell does exist, I was probably headed there, and deservedly so. The choice came down to being a better person overall or just not caring anymore, and when it was that simple, the decision was not only easy but satisfying as well.
 
What's funny is all us folks with one foot skirting each side...well....we don't REALLY believe in eternal damnation (hell) or there is no fokkin way we would be doing what we do.

If we knew for A FACT that this minuscule lifetime determined eternity of being tortured perpetually, burning in hell... well, we would suck that God cock all day long. We would. Of course we would! Unless you were a complete lunatic.

But we don't, so we don't.

It's a big fuckin' mind trip. Which I'm all about. Bring it. Why should anything start making sense now? :dance:
 
Yeah, that was a huge part of it too, the realization that my faith was mostly a pretense to help mitigate any hate that my gayness might attract here in the village. Then I found the forums and got to experience the freedom which is unapologetically throwing your lifestyle in the face of those who are inclined to dislike it. Now I wouldn't have it any other way. I hope one day some redneck fuck actually punches me over it, so I can watch as hate crime laws ruin the next couple years of his life.

Another big piece of my decision was a guilt trip my Mom was putting on me about totally ignoring my family, with the exception of a few select cousins who I consider friends, which is a much higher status to me than family. In particular my grandparents are getting old and want to see me more (especially since I'm only 20 miles away), but I really can't stand to be around them. This rage builds inside me to the point where I either get blind drunk or start yelling at them for being so fucked up that even two generations later we can't escape the madness. Sometimes both happens. It's never a good thing, and a few years ago I just stopped visiting altogether.

When I finally was able to free myself from the guilt of "abandoning" them, I found I wasn't quite done with the process. God was also another big source of guilt that I felt was much more external than something I really wished to resolve for my own happiness. Since I am indeed happier after cutting those bonds, I think I made the right decisions.
 
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