Random thoughts

You and me baby ain’t nothin’ but mammals so let’s do it like they do on the Discovery Channel.

:handshake:
 
Nationalism shares many of the same traits as safe spaces just on a different scale...
 
Women can be intensely cool even if not interested. I had one totally taken by a cool as fuck dude ask me for a cigarette and it was the heaviest American Spirit so she said it was disgusting because I know they talked to me and they can tell I am smoking WAY too many of those. So I heard you homie and I am now on the yellow American Spirits. This dude could tell I was going through a little alky withdrawal so he buys me an incredible pour and just walks off which is fucking amazing. Another great dude tells me he saw me make a bad move at the tables and he was right, and I got snapped off. I mostly came back from that though. Then I am waiting for the train to get me home feeling mostly dead and this 30 something incredible woman sits on the bench next to me eating the exact same thing as me. For anyone reading this get ready to lol.

So there is just a little bit of sandwich left so I say to her: do you know where there's any bums around here? Because I'm full now and I wanted to give back. You're obviously not a bum

Her: Uh huh

A small silence passes

Me, looking pretty sharp with a nice tablet coming out of my jacket: I forgot to tell you, I'm a bum

Her: You're good

Another silence

Me: Do you know that the weather's supposed to be like?

Her: No, I didn't check

Me: Well I hope it's horrible. Sorry I was drinking all night and I can get a little silly.

Her: It's ok

Silence passes, the train shows up and I tell her to have a good day.

COOL STORY BRO
 
My paranoia has me thinking that that would have been a hitter (in the best way possible) from the gambling community which would be fucking beyond awesome. She was perfect, owned me very quickly and left everything very open ended.

If that's the case then yes I DEFINITELY want to see her again. She is incredible and we could have a great time. I know what I said about Nicky the other day but she is pretty married and I believe has a kid with him so I can let that go for someone like that. She chose dickhead and her lame past (which is a trashbag ex who had her at home every night alone while he fucked some other girl all the time) over me so yeah, that's kind of on her - she's still cool but who's to say if somehow I made a move there that was somehow successful that she wouldn't do the same stuff? I unfortunately have no reason not to trust her not to do that again.

I have been talking to mortgage people mostly out of fear of going busto in gambling (no I'm not running bad, it's just a natural fear) but I mean if things go good and I'm with the right woman than we can just enjoy ourselves really and actually live the dream.

These people are so beyond great. I fell apart there one day about my Mother and it's like they all just want me to be ok and with them - so I'm starting to feel a TON of love there. Even if anything happens for whatever reason I just never knew that people doing that could be that cool. You know what? So can I.

And that's love.

#morestevesramblingyay
 
I don't think anyone the history of time is hornier than I am at this exact second.

OH MY GOD.
 
I love when I'm at the casino on 20+ shots and my piers laugh their asses off as I just about fall through the door coming back in after smoking.

That's awesome.

And so are you.
 
:lmao:

Thanks Xer

Yeah we're on a weening off day, gotta get this alky shit under control
 
Still mad god looking out on that dude who gave me that pour because I was detoxing while trying to get a good buzz going at the same time, and I will more than return that favor

Weird spot actually. I do feel like with a good buzz going I am a world class player, and without it paranoia fucks with me HARD. So what happens is cutoff time is 2 am and sadly it fucks me up. I become afraid of everything and ready to come out of my skin. I could get jacked. The fuzz could bring me down if I'm pissing in an ally or whatever.

I have to think about what to do about all that.

I guess drink more.
 
Anybody seen this dude around?

I met him the other night and he was a little wound up but cool.

cokekid.png


I have his lighter, please let him know.
 
Alright so I've hit some variance at the tables (that's the professional term for when you lose) some but not all off of bad play.

The thing is I need to play absolutely what I know as perfectly at all times.

So we have talked about how I can take advice from dudes to an extent but whereas my first instinct to any dude talking down to me is to stand up for myself and not listen right, where as I do respond to beautiful women immediately because I cannot stand to see them sad.

So, as many great women as I have made friends lately I don't have any to do this job.

The job is this, and it's for my favorite stripper. First off, since I didn't play well enough the last couple of days I am going to have her write "piece of crap loser" on my forearm right next to my tat. It has to be something that will truly shame me at the tables but won't piss off the staff or players there, as you know I do heart them all. The point is to embarass me because I hate being embarrassed. Then until I make it right I do pay for a dance but despite what her job is, she isn't nice. This is time for abuse. "How could you lose, how could you let everyone down" etc. I know them well enough to know how good she (if she's around) or any of them will be at this job.

I make it right, I get back what I've lost over the past two days and I get the nice dance which is fucking awesome.

I was debating pulling the trigger on this before but I guess I needed to feel some losing to do it. I hadn't lost significantly in a pretty good amount of time.

So, that's that, I report on what is written, and likely show it with my tat.

Enjoy.
 
Actually I just changed my mind on all of that. That could go my way but it also quickly could not. Gut instinct reaction to a lot of things.

I'm going to change things up and holla back.
 
I'm going to be honest -

That triple jack from the steakhouse on top of everything else knocked me on my fucking ass. Somehow I did play through it and I did make rent but holy fuck those are comped?

I know it was a $35 drink but you know what -

That is well worth it at the end of a session.

Don't nobody go blowin the loudy now.

 
I have somehow become the low level Stu Unger. And it's so weird.

But yes, it's true. And so. fucking weird.

Everything is changing SO quickly and it's all so fucking weird man. It just is.

So, whatever.

I don't care if you don't care.

Gamelive, let's have a buttbaby.