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Which Hand Do You Wipe With?

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Not really into the whole wiping thing. I like to let it dry and crackle up some then I'll jump and violently land naked ass first on the toilet and whatever falls out falls out. Save a lot on TP but a lot of money gets spent replacing toilets.
 
camilion15728
Like have you gone to the bathroom and did your business, and then realize there is NO more tp? then what?
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I ALWAYS check before releasing...it is a habit....but if this were to happen it would depend where I am and the type of shit.

If i'm at home, I will just walk to the TP supply with shit hanging off my ass. If there is none left I probably hop in the shower and shoot it off.

I'm i'm not at home I have to evaluate....if it felt like a pretty clean shit...I might risk it and live with the skidmarks as long as I know i'm going home soon. obv try to avoid the wedgie.

If the shit was nasty, I first probably search through my wallet for things I can wipe my ass with. Old receipts, business cards, etc. (I hear FW wipes his ass with $100 bills). After that my next course of action would probably be to wipe with the roll itself....as long as i'm rubbing my shit ass on something....(I'll throw it in the trash of course). Last resort is hand...but if I think you have to wipe above the wrist....if not how the F do you put your pants back on?

last thing I need is some dude to walk in the restroom and i'm standing there shit ass hanging out with my pants around my ankles while I'm washing shit off my hands in the sink
 
no cami....enough soap will get the shit off my hands.

i'm not gonna lie to you...I have wiped before and had some shit somehow get on my hands. I'll just wash a little extra and it never crosses my mind again. Granted I'm not eating French fries 5 min after but kind of like the 10 second rule....there is like a 20 min rule for shit on hands....after a good wash and 20 min after shit touches hand, feel free to start eating finger foods again.
 
Do you look down into the bowl before you do your business, at home and/or in public bathrooms?

Have you ever taken a shit, and you knew someone had to use the toilet after you, and there's a corn floating around in the bowl that just won't flush?

I mean especially in a public bathroom, that can potentially be embarrassing, either the next person gets grossed out, or maybe they say "hey, I know what you had with dinner last night!" Even if they don't react...you know they know.
 
I did that once and the chick (yes, it was a girls bathroom) opened her hand to show me some corn kernels and said she threw a few in there because she knew I'd try to use that line to pick her up.

We settled out of court.
 
When I go to re-do my bathroom at my cabin, I am seriously considering putting in a bidet... I have never really used one, but the thought of not filling up my septic tank with feces-laden paper is something to think about.
 
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