If companies had slogans that were realistic

[gregm]

Stouffers To Include Suicide Prevention Tips On Single Serving Frozen Meals

Stouffers says the suicide prevention tips are available on all single serving microwavable dinners whether you enjoy veal parmigiana alone or beef stroganoff alone. - The Onion

" the purchase of a mac and cheese for one may be a cry for help"

The saddest book ever?

 

[reno cool]

I like that little rodent who suggests chewing on the cable

 

[Blitty]

7-Eleven: Yes, we sell rolling papers

just lie back and think of england

Papa Johns "No healthcare, better pizza!"

Red Robin: When you don't want to spend much taking the kids out, but you need alcohol

Motel 6: calling coffee a continental breakfast since '65

Under Armor Clothes. Why actually exercise when you can just look like you plan to exercise ....eventually

[TWEET]186109152265895936 [/TWEET]

TGI Fridays: Thank God it's Friday so I can spend the rest of the weekend on the toilet

lol. Thanks for the money

Axe: Signaling everyone else that you just aren't ready to be in a real relationship yet.

Delta Airlines: Because Fuck you, that's why

World of Warcraft: Eleven million virgins can't be wrong

Boner showed me his world of Warcraft collection over the weekend. He has an entire shelf full of them.

His wife was very embarrassed.

He's officially a bigger GL nerd than Matty.

 

[Matty]

I'm taking a weekly picture of the wife's belly, and at the end I'll make an animated GIF out of them.

Still nowhere as nerdy as playing WoW.

I win. I think.

 

[roguejuror]

try to make it always under same settings

 

[gregm]

try to make it always under same settings

Hot pockets? When I used to eat them they would always be cold in the middle and blazing hot cheese even following directions and using that pouch. I am physically scarred from that shit. lol. good times

I love this place

steak and shakes new late night menu.

Steak and Shakes new late night menu. Yeah we know you are high

I thought this stoner marketing would work with the fully loaded nachos at taco bell

Motel 6: Its 2 am and you have a prostitute, we'll leave the light on.

KFC: would you like a side of racism with that?

Red Lobster: come for the biscuits, stay because you want more fucking biscuits

Plenty Of Fish, well whales specifically.

La Quinta: Spanish for "Next to Denny's"

Apple: You're dumb enough to pay extra for a pretty laptop,phone, pad etc. and we want to make money, let's help each other out.

Apple - Spend More, Do Less, Look Cool

Dominos: For people who don't like pizza

 

[roguejuror]

Hot pockets?

no, matty's pregnant belly

same light, same spot, same angle

 

[Matty]

Rogatien thinks I'm some kind of amateur. Black person please.

 

[roguejuror]

why is kfc racist?

 

[gregm]

no, matty's pregnant belly

same light, same spot, same angle

I thought you were talking about the settings on the microwave.

 

[roguejuror]

Rogatien thinks I'm some kind of amateur. Black person please.

i remember your big camera

 

[Matty]

Long gone. New one is bigger.

 

[Gilmartin]

Internet Explorer: your number 1 browser for downloading other browsers

 

[gregm]

Radio Shack- Buying a pack of batteries? Whats your address?

Jack in the box- Because you are drunk and you are broke

Lululemon- Made by men for men

Lululemon see through yoga pants recalled

http://www.businessweek.com/articles/2013-03-28/what-lululemons-yoga-pants-recall-reveals

Fiji- If you love the taste of water and hate money, try Fiji.

Gamestop- you think your game is worth HOW much?!??

Gamestop- Best I can do is 10% of its value in store credit.

Sonic- No mustard on that burger? Tough shit you're getting mustard

 

[roguejuror]

yoga pants recall lol

 

[gregm]

I just finished reading some articles on snowden

Verizon Wireless: "When we say we have a Share Everything plan, we really mean we share EVERYTHING."

lets expand these cable providers

Time Warner: Did we say we were coming at 1? We meant Fuck You.

Ruth's Chris "Annnnnnd now you're wallet's empty."

Monsanto: Soylent Greed

Pepsi : you dont have coke? sigh. yeah thats fine

these are real ads for real companies

an ad for an english language school in lsrael

aquarium in london

gym reminder

burrito place that compares newborns to the size of burritos

 

[gregm]

My space now you're somebody I used to know

T-Mobile - "We'll give you this phone for free. You'll just have to pay for it in the bill."

Facebook releases new post-NSA-Prism-leak privacy settings

Obama and nsa checking out gregms results on the gamelive mlb contest

laughing at gregms search history

checking out gamelive gif thread

 

[Cami]

Duckayyyyyy! I fuckin love that ducky!