CaliGirl's Match.com Escapades

yes Cali, he wants to do that because he's a nutter with nowhere else to go

actually no, i don't know that and i'm just being snarky

but the thought of you going out with these randoms is a bit skeevy... yeah i know, how else do you meet people in a big city? i just really don't like these ppl... you have JL on emergency 911 text i presume?
 
Maybe you need to adjust your filters on the service. Instead of relationship criteria you should look for absorbent liver, substantial income and Mandingo dick.

Maybe Cali can find herself a Bread, Durito, Matty hybrid.


Cali, I'm still selling Muddy as a potential mate. Sure he doesn't drink any more and yeah due to significant fluctuation in the sports wagering market he has recently gone back to work and he didn't get swept away in the Toilet Paper Roll picture craze so I can't comment on the size of his schlong but apparently he ejaculates with enough force to pop the rubber right off the MudPacker.
 
Oksana
yes Cali, he wants to do that because he's a nutter with nowhere else to go

actually no, i don't know that and i'm just being snarky

but the thought of you going out with these randoms is a bit skeevy... yeah i know, how else do you meet people in a big city? i just really don't like these ppl... you have JL on emergency 911 text i presume?
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Bigger nutter than Blitty? I don't think so pal
 
wal66
Maybe you need to adjust your filters on the service. Instead of relationship criteria you should look for absorbent liver, substantial income and Mandingo dick.

Maybe Cali can find herself a Bread, Durito, Matty hybrid.


Cali, I'm still selling Muddy as a potential mate. Sure he doesn't drink any more and yeah due to significant fluctuation in the sports wagering market he has recently gone back to work and he didn't get swept away in the Toilet Paper Roll picture craze so I can't comment on the size of his schlong but apparently he ejaculates with enough force to pop the rubber right off the MudPacker.
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Wow.


Wow.

:lmao:
 
CaliGirlNJ
blue pill helps a guy stay hard, but doesn't help when the penis is just small in size, even when hard.

i wrote that post with a ton of humor - don't take it so seriously - i know i'll find someone with a great big cock who can fuck me all night and morning who isn't Chris... i just hate dating trying to find that person.
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You should just do porn.

You're that kind of girl.

You're looking for a cock. Not a person or a relationship. If all you're looking for is dick, a dick is what you'll end up with.

Stay classy.
 
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I'm looking for the full package. I'm not going to settle for someone with a flaccid dick who can't fuck me. Maybe you (monkeyfocker) are willing to settle for someone who can't sexually please you, but I refuse.
 
CaliGirlNJ
I'm looking for the full package. I'm not going to settle for someone with a flaccid dick who can't fuck me. Maybe you (monkeyfocker) are willing to settle for someone who can't sexually please you, but I refuse.
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You gave the guy ONE try.

You're not the full package.
 
Cali there might be something being missed here, an opportunity of sorts.

Have you heard of BeenVerified.com? It's a service that does background checks on potential suitors. What I'm pretty sure it doesn't do and where you opportunity lies is the type of information they don't provide. Cali, there must be thousands maybe tens of thousands of girls out there that want the skinny on guys that your basic services just don't provide.

Cali, you could start your own service and dish the cock details that women like yourself are so deserving of. Think about it Cali, you will have to change your personal "i don't fuck every guy I meet" motto but in doing so you could make loads of extra income selling your information to others like yourself.
 
MonkeyF0cker
You gave the guy ONE try.

You're not the full package.
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this all a little too close to home for you sweetheart? don't worry, there are girls who are willing to settle for limp dicks. you'll find one some day.
 
wal66
Cali there might be something being missed here, an opportunity of sorts.

Have you heard of BeenVerified.com? It's a service that does background checks on potential suitors. What I'm pretty sure it doesn't do and where you opportunity lies is the type of information they don't provide. Cali, there must be thousands maybe tens of thousands of girls out there that want the skinny on guys that your basic services just don't provide.

Cali, you could start your own service and dish the cock details that women like yourself are so deserving of. Think about it Cali, you will have to change your personal "i don't fuck every guy I meet" motto but in doing so you could make loads of extra income selling your information to others like yourself.
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thats actually very genius
 
CaliGirlNJ
this all a little too close to home for you sweetheart? don't worry, there are girls who are willing to settle for limp dicks. you'll find one some day.
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I've had it happen to me after massive amounts of blow. I imagine most guys have had it happen under certain circumstances. I didn't really care about the girl anyway. But if I did and she reacted like you did after one time, I'd know that she's not worth a bucket of shit.

It says a lot more about you (personality-wise) than any guy that it would happen to.

And maybe you're not as hot as you think you are. You can't even get guys hard when you get undressed.
 
MonkeyF0cker
You can't even get guys hard when you get undressed.
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scooby_ruh_roh.jpg
 
I'm not really a fan of this online dating game. Why can't you just show up to a bar with a girlfriend and flaunt your "good" looks ?

I refuse to try a dating service. It just says to me that the whole fun of finding a mate is a worthless process and I just want an answer now. So go match and find me an answer that I'll adapt to given I'm eager enough to start looking online anyway. Different strokes for different folks I suppose.

Hopefully it works out for you.
 
Cali, if you're willing to do go the extra mile you can rate both men and women.

Cali's Cocks & Cooters
 
Fling would be a better site maybe
give it a try
 
MonkeyF0cker
I've had it happen to me after massive amounts of blow. I imagine most guys have had it happen under certain circumstances. I didn't really care about the girl anyway. But if I did and she reacted like you did after one time, I'd know that she's not worth a bucket of shit.

It says a lot more about you (personality-wise) than any guy that it would happen to.

And maybe you're not as hot as you think you are. You can't even get guys hard when you get undressed.
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i was very polite about it, in fact i was REALLY nice about it. and he was embarrassed and felt bad. he kept saying he wanted to. he blamed some anxiety pill he took.
i didn't text him today - and he didn't reach out to me either. I think it goes both ways. i'm not too worried. there will be other dudes in the future. why settle for this one now? beyond that there are other reasons we're not right for each other. don't assume this is the ONLY reason i'm not gonna call him.

Even chris has had nights where he can't complete... but at least it starts hard and finishes in the morning. he also makes damn sure I cum, even when I don't even care if i do or don't.
 
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