Thread where Steves rambles about life

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max headroom

max headroom

RIP Mac
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As requested it will all go in here. All of it. I just don't really have anyone else to tell right now so, again I apologize. Things have been so crazy.

Yesterday stopped by this bar and made some friends. One out of nowhere drives me to a good casino. We were both COMPLETELY faced. I win - mostly luck that time - the late night/early morning players over there are all really good and really cool too. They could have had my vip ass kicked out. The dude that drives me to the casino says he has something to take care of in his apartment so I pass out in his car waiting for him only to be awakened by his wife screaming at me for keeping him out all night. She gets pissed as fuck so he crashes at my place for a bit.

I guess I made some more friends, so that's cool.

But holy fuck.

That shit was crazy, lol.

My Goodness.
 
Fucking knee is so fucked up and I am so hungover I miss my probation meeting. She calls. she's incredibly cool but she has to do her job, I understand. No clink for Stevie yet but possibly in about a month. There will be a hearing. Now I have to actually hire a defense attorney. It's out of my control now because I am a 42 year old sophomore in college. They can fuck my shit up so badly but they don't want to. Scary shit man. II do live a very good life right now but I NEED to get my shit together so badly.

Phew. Phew. Phew Phew. Can I breathe. Thank God the answer is yes. My goodness.

and that's life.
 
People - don't drink and drive.

They can REALLY fuck you up. Thank God I didn't hurt of those hotties out there by being a retard. They were so nice to me, everyone was - not just them but all the cool people - even when I was at my worst, they are so gorgeous and I exist to protect beautiful women, never ever hurt them. Ever. People tried to help me take off in music out there and I wasn't very good so that's pretty fucking cool. When I get good at that then you had better believe I am gonna play for them because - that's love is what it is.

(slaps self in the face, other personality says YOU SAID YOU WOULDN'T FUCK UP BUT YOU DID AGAIN)

Gotta catch up with them and Ice out there real soon, it's just a really complicated trip when you have NO CAR.

(punches self in the face)

It'll be ok in time. Time and money. Time and money.
 
That conversation did not go very well but I think she gave me time to take care of my stuff so I can show it to the judge. Yes I did 100 hours of community service and yes I did the rehab clinic (somehow ended up meeting cool people there as well) but I have to do 2 more things. She didn't demand I come up right now or just go ahead and violate me now either of which she could have done.

So - that's a little bit of mercy given to me I think and that's pretty damn cool actually.

I will pay that forward.
 
So out in that town I am playing my now stolen acoustic in the little park. One dude that I can tell is a total winner tells me after I'm playing where is my mind that we have to jam sometime. Another that I try to teach bar chords lets me do a little solo show with his guitar and the hotties flip us some pocket change. That shit is so cool, all of a sudden you see a gorgeous ass and a bunch of coins bouncing around. Also at the park the one guy shows up with his daughter so I play Modesto for them and they clap and smile. It was so beautiful. Another guy in another park hears me wind up puttin it down, stops, smiles and says that was pretty good. Love. I'm comin for you guys and we're gonna have a lot of fun.

Also Philly was very supportive about that. The kid I bought the guitar from was cool as fuck. The people near that apartment that gave me a slow clap at the end of a song. And since I"m me and I do weird shit I pull a bono - dress up as a bum (though the cool kids told me I look too good to be a bum, that was pretty funny) and rock out. The bums don't like it so I record them threatening me. Suddenly they because very supportive.

Music. We have to get back to that, we really do.

Because guys here's what needs to happen. Cards is awesome and it's always going to be there. If I start to feel too stressed out by then I can just tie on a comfy buzz and rock out on the street.

That's a good life.
 
I try to make any situation work. For instance just a bit over at the grocery store I think this one cashier is attractive. I'm hungover as FUCK so I tell her all about the drinking, falling and getting stranded in Philly for a night. She giggled at the whole thing and smiled really big and I'm glad that I was able to make her happy for a bit. I told her she looks really pretty today and she softly said thank you.

Might ask that one if I can buy her a drink sometime and see if I can play with her very sexy boobies.

I think if she's interested I can make her a whole lot happier than that.
 
Gotta stay more hydrated. This is bad today and I'm lucky I didn't throw up in that grocery store or out on the street. See when you drink the way I do your body has tranquilizers to keep you from being too paranoid. When you sober up after a bender the tranquilizers fade so you're stuck throwing up and thinking the world is against you. It's a tough spot man and this needs to stop happening because we can't be getting thrown out of places we need to play at. We could actually break a knee next fall and no one has time for that. I am meeting a lot of cool people but they could turn on you and take your money or worse, or someone else could. Next time you miss that train you could have to sleep on the street. Can't happen.

This is detoxing and it it tough but it's gotta be done. We haven't been putting enough cards for multiple reasons so it's time to get our priorities straight.
 
Let's not forget another reason. Potential backers at the casino have been making fun of me for drinking so much. With court coming up and my case soon expiring I'm going to to REALLY need a fucking CAR because I couldn't get that sexy ass Nissan out of the impound yard and so there went THAT round of guitars, clothes, etc.. but with proper backing I could make that ok really quickly. Also I've been told by multiple doctors that if I don't slow down I will die, so no one needs that. I would like to exist here with you guys as long as possible.

A lot of reasons. So many reasons.
 
Somehow this website guy remembered to remind me when randomthoughts.com is available. We are going to negotiate. We'll see what that ends up as.
 
Stopped by the Asian massage parlor today just to check out pricing. It's really beautiful in there but pretty expensive. The candy at the front desk looked delicious.

I think that could be a win when the stress is cranked up.
 
Still no beers all day. I hope this Cliff Bar stays down. The shrimp didn't.

#fuck
 
Somehow we end up tearing the insides out our wallet. We are talking at the casino, can't find the plastic parts and going to the counter asking if anyone has picked up the plastic part that contained all my ID's and cards. So we order a new wallet.

Unreal.
 
Starting to feel a little bitter today. Cards with no shots is likely after some cleaning, laundry and a workout. If I need to hit one of the very cool bars I've been to lately I can do that as a reward after winning. Like a normal person, you know? We are not Stu Unger. We are Steves. Nice try though, lol. RIP Stu, he did a ton for the game - much love brother.

Detoxing - it happens.
 
Because blasting $300 blind steal bets because you're sloshed and are worried about jail is good poker. No it isn't when you only have pocket 4's but once again you get lucky. Guess what - keep doing that and you won't be lucky at all. Because getting lost places and having to pay people a hundo there and a hundo there to protect your dumb ass is smart. No, it isn't. They're cool as heck though, it's just how the world works. It is cool that I have a driver there and a bodyguard there on call if necessary.But guess what? Get smoked, and all of them, all my hopes and dreams, everything goes "poof" as I have to figure out a 9 to 5 with no nice clothes. So it's my job to make it not necessary and chill with them the right way. They can be support. Work reward. Repeat. Repeat again. Because this, because that. It's all coming back to me now. We've been lucky. Amateur hour shit and could have been smoked at any time. Amateur hour is over. This can't be play time. This is work.
 
And I do really miss being able to hide from all the fear. Missing my family. She never called because again I was drunk and said something fucked up. It at times was working out but it spiraled quickly into total self destruction.

I guess no one saw that coming right.

Except for everyone but my dumb ass.

Yeah, real tough call.
 
Wow Randomthoughts is worth 5 figs for starters.

Moving on from that.

:lmao:
 
The knee is actually not that great.

I try to move as fast as I am used to and I fall. The fuck is this shit.

Time. Healing.

I am NOT going to the hospital. I won't.

Whatever.

Pain. It's ok. But ok I feel like moving like I am used to, ok.

OK.

 
I am so fucking sick of being pornshamed. I really am.

But it is part of life I guess at this point.

Revenge porn is worse but at the same time better I guess if you think about it.

I need time for this knee.

So hey don't destroy me.


Let's be friends and have a GREAT time.

We'll get there.

I love all of you.

Let my knee rest up. I actually fucked it up pretty good the other night.

Love.
 
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