The Atheist Bible

[Blitty]

Questions For Us By Us.



How do I say "I swear to god" in a figurative sense when referring to; I really did do something. ?

Ex. I swear to god I washed all the produce before cooking our dinner tonight.


Wondering minds need to know.

 

[Matty]

I substitute the name of a celebrity.

For the love of Don Cherry

Miley H Cyrus

etc.

 

[Cami]

Honest to goodness I did.

 

[Blitty]

I substitute the name of a celebrity.

For the love of Don Cherry

Miley H Cyrus

etc.

That makes sense.

 

[Blitty]

Honest to goodness I did.

I'd feel a little :fagotity: saying that but will give it a try.

 

[Cami]

I can see that. Just sayin that's what I say.

 

[IAG]

Why do you need to swear to something at all? Why not just say "I washed all the produce before cooking dinner tonight?"

 

[Archie]

Let your yes be yes and your no be no

 

[bacon]

oh for the love of junipers

 

[Mudcat]

I use a lot of the same religious expressions but I use them ironically. When I think about it, I employ a ton of irony in my speech and writing on the forum. I know some people pick up that I'm being "funny" but I suspect many don't.

Like when I use a sentence construction along the lines of, "So I was all like holy shit," I estimate that half the people know I'm making fun of people who actually speak like that and the other half think I really talk like that.

Same with the religious stuff. Well sometimes I will put a finer point on my intentions. Instead of saying, "For the love of god," I would be more likely to say, "For the love of the sweet baby jesus." It's just a little more obvious.

I think I am more concerned about misunderstandings on that stuff. That's probably why I refrain from capitalizing certain key religious stuff too.

I am okay with people thinking I am part valley girl, but I definitely don't want them thinking I'm actually religious.


I like the expression, "He's up in heaven now," for someone who has just died. I find that one particularly hilarious.

 

[Tron]

I wonder what happens to people when they die.

I wish we had a dead poster (who somehow still has the ability to post) so he could shed some light on how death is.

 

[Archie]

Some amazing stories here, thank you all for sharing. It helps.

I am old, and like a few others here, I have a fogged over past, so I don't remember everything.

But I think this is the first suicide I can remember that touched me personally. It certainly is a difficult thing to handle. I think mostly because it is hard to get a handle on. The Ken I knew was, while somewhat amoral, always cheery and upbeat. Starts one thinking what was I missing....

.

 

[Mudcat]

I wonder what happens to people when they die.

I wish we had a dead poster (who somehow still has the ability to post) so he could shed some light on how death is.

Yeah. I don't know why it's so hard for people to just say, "I don't know," when they don't know something. But some of the random stories they come up with can be good for a laugh.

 

[bacon]

I wish we had a dead poster (who somehow still has the ability to post) so he could shed some light on how death is.

Such a good point

 

[Tron]

Well played, Archie.

 

[MrX]

I think I am more concerned about misunderstandings on that stuff. That's probably why I refrain from capitalizing certain key religious stuff too.

Interesting. I've always really enjoyed capitalizing personal pronouns that refer to God. Hopefully, He'll appreciate that I went out of the way to do that when I'm standing at the pearly gates.

 

[Mudcat]

May you get maximum utility out of your 77 virgins.

 

[housepicks]

Yall are wiskey bent and hell bound